SANTA ANSWERS HIS MAIL

---

---

---

---

WELCOME TO The EZINE WRITER emagazine! • "Useless as a fireproof match" says Chicago Tribune! •   We wish you a safe and happy holiday! I made myself a snowball, As perfect as could be, I thought I'd keep it as a pet, And let it sleep with me. I made it some pajamas, And a pillow for its head, Then last night it ran away, But first - it wet the bed! ***HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS*** • T h e  E Z I N E  W R I T E R • D E S I G N E D  W I T H  Y O U R  M I N D  I N  M&nbs p;I N D <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> |||||||||||| The EZINE WRITER ||||||||||| <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> S A N T A   A N S W E R S   H I S   M A I L _____________________-«{}»-_____________________ "...Dear Susan, Milk gives me the craps and carrots make the deer fart in my face..."   D ear Santa,   I wud like a kool toy space ranjur for Xmas. Iv ben a good boy all yeer.    YeR FReND, BiLLy Dear Billy,   Nice spelling. You're on your way to being a career lawncare specialist. How 'bout I send you a fricking book so you can learn to read and write? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger, at least HE can spell!    Santa _____________ ‹› _____________ Dear Santa,   I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and joy in the world for everybody!    Love, Sarah Dear Sarah,   Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they?    Santa _____________ ‹› _____________ Dear Santa,   I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do.    Love, Teddy Dear Teddy,   What -- and ruin that hot affair your dad's still having with the babysitter? He's banging her like a screen door in a hurricane, son! Let me get you some nice Legos instead.    Santa _____________ ‹› _____________ Dear Santa,   I want a new bike, a PlayStation, a train, some G.I. Joes, a dog, a drum kit, a pony, and a tuba.    Love, Francis Dear Francis,   Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays?    Santa _____________ ‹› _____________ Dear Santa,   I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I left carrots for your reindeer outside the backdoor.    Love, Susan Dear Susan,   Milk gives me the craps and carrots make the deer fart in my face. You want to be a butt kisser? Leave me a glass of Chivas Regal and some Toblerone.    Santa ______________________<>_____________________ This has been another useless posting from The EZINE WRITER emagazine! %%%    _________________________________________________________ Copywight 2014 - Elmer Fudd All Wights Weserved %%%    _________________________________________________________ _______________________________                     |||||| Bradley |||||| Grand poobah and bathroom attendant. mailto: EzineWriterOwner@gmail.com ________________________________ <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> ______________________________ |||||||||||| The EZINE WRITER ||||||||||| Designed With Your Mind In Mind <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>   Get more! Click here for our Facebook page!   KEYWORDS: the ezine writer, lawncare, brother, world, pot, babysitter, PlayStation, reindeer, fart, Chivas Regal.